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BloodFrost
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Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 2:55 am |
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MalkavianPosts: 21Location: Oregon Ohio USAJoined: Sun Aug 14, 2005 8:53 pm
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It's strange how things seems to come together in a certain order that conflicks with personal everyday life?? I find, that what I was looking for is found when I give up looking... and after the work is done- theres always more to do. A mistake takes so much away, but when you do it the right way- it seems to never pay off. I sit here losing myself to the thoughts of who I was once- and how much iv'e changed. Everytime I fall asleep and wake to a new day; and go do what i'm payed off to do....Same thing, but so different......seeing the people i've seen on my work shift- they are in the same boat- but so different. Do you ever dream of meeting the world with open arms- yet afterwards think about it, whats the point? This shell of a figure that hold my spirt, mind, and soul is to be dead- cold in the ground in which it was made of. You mearly live only in the memories that haunt your loved ones, friends, co-workers, and the people who wanted to meet you that now can never. Yet on the top of all this pointlessness, there is hope and faith that true love will find you- to watch your family grow- to goals, adventures not yet token and maybe your fifteen mins of fame. But what is the point if death is the final resting place? You die alone- the color fades in Your eyes. Whats is next is the outcome of your adventures.
Is there a 20ish before/mid life crisis? If so I think i'm steppin in and out of it. My job is comlicated- almost every other day from work I smoke a bowl to slow down my over worked mind. I'm fu*king twenty- and life wants me to be- something I just dont want to be right now.
I met a girl thats twentyfive, she has looks, a manager job, a faster mustang then me and.........a kid. I've never been in this situation- and dont know anyone that has been. Shes divorced. I kinda know how it fells without the legal resposibilty- I was engaged once to my high school sweet heart...but we broke that up when she went to college in the desert across the U.S........I think i'm gonna date this one, her name is Cat. 8)
I guess this Life thing is startin to work out- I have faith in finding love and love finding me back. I believe that when I die my mortal death- I will be forever dancing above in the clouds and possibily playing the guitar in the rain. Watching down when its sunny out- and explore the stars at night.
I'm I crazy or are these normal thouhts? Do you fell me? Are we all these same pages writen in time and age? Do you smoke weed? Have you found true love yet; not only in your pants? Do you like the night? Huh? What what?? Goodnight my fellow vampiric clans. (Vanishes)
_________________ BloodFrost |
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Drain
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Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 6:27 pm |
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NosferatuPosts: 331Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 3:50 am
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we have all been there.. but no matter what happens just remember
200 years from now there won't be a single person on this planet who will remember you.
your grandchildren will have died.. and with them any memory of you. So do what ever you want.. NO ONE YOU WILL BE FORGOTTEN SOON..
its sad but true..
as a whole life is good i guess. you play and enjoy as a child. become adventerous as a young adult, find love (hopefully) have children to watch them grow as an adult.. .... ... .... ... then i guess aaahh ummm. well... sit back and remember about the past as an elderly person resentfull of the youth around you.. thats what im going to do..
_________________ Secret. Secret..... there is nothing for which one cannot use a spy...(Sun Tzu. The Art of War) |
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Gabriel
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Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 9:57 pm |
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VentruePosts: 1554Location: Virginia, USAJoined: Fri Apr 04, 2003 5:05 pm
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As someone who has recently passed the age of 20 (if you count 4 years ago as recently!) I feel qualified to answer your question.
Ahem.
Yes. My life at your age was very similiar. I worked a job that I felt was pointless, I wasn't going to school, and was living in my parents basement. I was single and smoked way too much pot. It's actually about the time I started vamping! It was a great distraction from how miserable I was in my real life.
It's a common thing I think. We have such access to the world around us that sometimes our life can seem claustrophobic. It's a challenge, and sometimes it's hard to see the overall goal. It can seem like such a glistening speck on the horizon, that sometimes you can hardly remember what it is at all.
But we grow. And we live. There are thousands of millions thinking the exact same thing facing some of the exact same struggles. You'll find your niche. You'll live your life, just be sure you enjoy it and that those around you are better off for having known you.
No, chances are no one will remember you two centuries from now. But that's alright. It's organic. It's natural! We're part of something much bigger than any of us. Think of all the people who have come and gone over the years. They've returned to the cycle. It all sounds very "Circle of Life" hippy-ish. But it's the truth!
That's the way I view life and I'm happy as a result. Don't worry man, you'll find what you're looking for.
_________________ Money can't buy you friends, but it can buy you a better class of enemies. |
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Lady Cyrilynn
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Posted: Sat Oct 08, 2005 8:42 pm |
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Old Clan TzimiscePosts: 704Location: Seattle, Washington, USAJoined: Thu Jul 10, 2003 3:29 am
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Been there, done that, don't want to do it again (altho' my crisis hit when I realized I was a quarter century old!). I do have to admit that, despite having lived thru the hippie days, I've never smoked pot. Lived around and thru it but never experienced it. I don't think I've missed anything.
I've found, now that I'm this age, that I have one goal in life. :shock:
I'm going to live long enough to be a problem to the world!! :twisted:
MWHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!
_________________ You come to me for a mere assassination? Foolish creature, there is more to be gained from my skills then that!. Before I am finished, death will be welcomed as a release. |
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Evil Eveshka
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Posted: Mon Oct 10, 2005 3:13 am |
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Daughters of IshtarPosts: 41Joined: Sun Aug 08, 2004 11:33 pm
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Life is just whacky. Here I am dating this absolute doll: she is sweet, generous, smart, talented, has almost the same interests in life that I do, is drop dead gorgeous, seems to be a romantic soul, etc etc etc. So what do I do? I feel guilty thinking I am cheating on the psycho-bitch to whom I was engaged who walked out on me in FEBRUARY!!!! I spoke to the ex today and told her about said new girlfriend. She actually seemed happy for me. S what does the retarded Petey go and do? He actually feels like he MISSES being mistreated by the psycho bitchwad and would really rather attempt to get a kind word from the ex like once every 3 months as opposed to being treated like a well loved equal from the new girl on a daily basis. This is the REAL kicker, in the looks and sensuality department, the NEW girl completely blows away the old one. Ahh well.
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BloodFrost
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 2:05 am |
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MalkavianPosts: 21Location: Oregon Ohio USAJoined: Sun Aug 14, 2005 8:53 pm
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:twisted: Im 20- dating a 25 and a 18....im not a player I just cant make up my mind. One has a kid, one is a virgin. Choices....errr....fuck it.
_________________ BloodFrost |
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Gabriel
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 3:03 pm |
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VentruePosts: 1554Location: Virginia, USAJoined: Fri Apr 04, 2003 5:05 pm
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Sounds like baggage either way.
_________________ Money can't buy you friends, but it can buy you a better class of enemies. |
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Isabella Garrett
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Posted: Sun Oct 16, 2005 9:19 pm |
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Get your clan name here - PM JuliusPosts: 285Location: yorkshireJoined: Thu Feb 24, 2005 11:21 pm
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Baggage heh? so when is a woman not baggage then?
::mutters:: lol
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